Right, Left, and Center
Seeking Equanimity in a Time of Extremes
I have long loved the following teaching, attributed to Rabbi Simcha Bunim of Peshischa (1765–1827):
Everyone must have two pockets, with a note in each pocket, so that he or she can reach into the one or the other, depending on the need. When feeling lowly and depressed, discouraged or disconsolate, one should reach into the right pocket, and, there, find the words: “For my sake was the world created.” But when feeling high and mighty one should reach into the left pocket, and find the words: “I am but dust and ashes.”
—From Tales of the Hasidim by Martin Buber
In the best and worst of times, I have reached into those two proverbial pockets. Sometimes, an honest self-assessment has naturally led my right or left hand to the message I needed to read. Other times, it has been more difficult to correctly choose right or left, as Rabbi Bunim’s radical theology of personal authenticity attests. But never before has the process of knowing which way to turn been as complicated as it is now.
Each day raises difficult questions: Should I attend tonight’s rally to support the hostage families or allow myself a much-needed distraction? Should I inject politics into a conversation over a meal with friends or listen to their family updates, which provide a necessary sense of normalcy? Should I stop to gaze into the faces of the hostages on the tattered posters plastered on the bus stop or continue to go about my daily errands?
As I weigh my choices, my hands fiddle with Rabbi Bunim’s notes. My external reality, overshadowed by a seemingly interminable war, a dire hostage situation, and political dysfunction, make it impossible for me to grasp one of his important messages—that we are always worthy of pursuing our goals and enjoying life’s pleasures. My internal reality, as an individual in a free society, resists his equal and opposite reminder—that we are no different from anyone else, including, now, those struggling to survive in the dust and ashes of Gaza.
Combing our pockets for answers may keep us within proximity of ourselves, but it will not center us nor bring us peace of mind. The only way to find the equanimity we need now more than ever, as Rabbi Bunim likely knew, is to shed our pocketed garments and search deep within ourselves.